Hello, you forum Dasarians you. Those that know me, know that I have a tendency to soapbox. Alas, the IRC is rather absent of people to rant to, so my soapbox will just have to be here.
I love Dasaria.
That means, I love Dasarians.
I love you, avid forum-lurker!
Sappy sounding, yes. But I have reason to be. And I mean this genuinely. The type of love that makes you want to be the best you you can be. Because...
I got to know you. Not everyone, but a lot of you. And you were beautiful people. You weren't always perfect, but neither was I. And that was okay. You accepted me. I felt like we were a family. We laughed. A lot. And we argued over petty, stupid things, like siblings do.
I did not have this in my life before.
I was a very isolated person.
I was emotionally abused by the one person who should never do so.
So believe me when I say Dasaria was important in bringing me an attachment to people I didn't have before.
Not only did I make some of my most long lasting and real friendships here,
but I was encouraged.
An encouragement I did not receive except from teachers, who are really supposed
to be encouraging as part of their job.
Encouragement in the steps into adulthood,
but also encouragement in creativity and simple fun.
I was safe here.
Now that's not something I've gotten in other online communities. Maybe it was because we were a smaller community.
For those of you I was not well acquainted with, I can honestly say I appreciated all of your characters. Just because they didn't click with mine, I loved the differences in mindsets, the challenge, interaction, or even sometimes the LACK of interaction, the ambient chance I ran across your roleplay. Because, you are a creator
. You, like me, had a story. An idea. You gave it shape. A face, a name, a personality. Feelings, and histories. You helped to create a living, breathing world that I shared.
I'm not perfect. I'll be the first to admit it. I was wrong, sometimes. Maybe pig-headed. Or over-sensitive. I'm a human being. I'm sure I said things I didn't mean. But I've always thought that, mistakes are made, and the best for all involved is to move on, do better next time. To let it go, because if you don't, you're left with negative thoughts, about yourself and others. And those thoughts desaturate and try to eclipse good memories.
To those that have left:
I understand some of you felt unappreciated.
Some others felt ignored.
A few specific people were angry at a specific person.
And there's the agreement that at its core Dasaria is a game, and you shouldn't play it if its upsetting you.
I can't argue against that.
And I'm told, sometimes, that it's just run its course for some people, that they've found other places, activities, life struggles.
And I wish you happiness, and good luck.
But I'll be here.
As long as I'm welcome.
And when, if you log in, I'll be happy to see you.
I'm playing here still, developing character stories as always.
And I've recently re-read the epic typos thread
. It made me laugh.
And it made me wonder about all those stories I was never directly involved in.
The romances, the rivalries, the quirks, the aspirations.
In one of those typo posts I sent a tell to Rohenna once, asking if "he'd woo'd her yet". I can't remember who that was about, but I wish I did.
And I remember being semi fixated on Baby's Nuararian. She's the one that inspired me to try Vana, who I'm still playing occasionally. I kind of want to capture that dreamy, ascetic quality, but don't think I can!
I remember Terrah working quietly behind the scenes, fueling information to a certain wizard she respected and thought could and would use the information she provided to destroy a common enemy.
I remember Fyvre and Naq Runalia "Click" being asked to have dinner with Artisan Smith. Those two wildwomen agreed--but on their terms. They had an outdoors fancy dinner! Click, raising her pinky finger to "sip" from her mug was priceless.
And the Vanguard in general I still love all the oomph behind it. Perhaps we were clumsy in our efforts, but what do you expect from a rowdy group of hell-raisers and misfits?
The Wogs. Willow and Ward, the most strange duo EVER. Lockslotho from Utu's misfits. Terrah arguing with Carric...
Dasaria gave me an exercise of feeling. Rage in conflict, despair in loss. And wonder from the very get go. A magic super bear, ressurrecting a party from doom... A strange, warm tree in a dying, morose town. Always when things seemed doomed, there was a glimmer of hope.
I have so many good memories, if I could capture them in paint, I could fill every inch of wall in the house.
It's these I hold close, as I move forward.
Some might think it silly that an entirely imagined world could or should mean so much to someone.
But, those people aren't really Dasarians.